Vent Session

It’s Wednesday and I’m already over this week.

S has been battling a nasty cough and congestion.  Monday he starting getting a rash mainly on his face.  I’m guessing this could be Fifth Disease, which is a common virus that results in rash.  That’s my Dr. Google diagnosis, anyway.  He hasn’t been sleeping well and the congestion is causing him to vomit.  I walked in the door after work on Monday and S immediately puked on me.  Poor guy.  He always gets the weird viruses.

I had a work dinner yesterday and realized I’m constantly selling myself short.  I was asked questions about my projects and previous experiences by a few new colleagues.  After answering their questions, I realized I was continuously downplaying my role by describing my projects as having few problems and previous jobs as simple.  I’m cringing as I type that.  I’ve worked hard and managed projects effectively… why am I not giving myself any credit?  So mad at myself.

Related, my coworker was recently promoted.  We had the same title and did the same type of work until he got promoted.  He deserved the promotion, but he also had the opportunity to demonstrate his competency when he was given a new, challenging project.  It didn’t bother me that he got promoted – he was presented with a challenge and overcame it… good for him.  But I also realized he was being given additional project work in an area I expressed interest in and I’m disappointed I wasn’t considered.  He has a brand new baby as well and I might just be a little envious that everything seems to be going his way.  Also envious that he can just carry on with work dinners and frequent travel though he has a newborn and meanwhile, I have a two and four year old and feel immense guilt for partaking in these types of activities a couple times per year.  Sigh.

S got up at 4:15 this morning.  W got to bed late, woke up too early, and had a tantrum about 5 seconds after getting out of bed.  Both boys have check-ups today and vaccinations.  We have kindergarten night at W’s preschool tomorrow night.  Ugghhhhh….  And I won’t even mention the pissy email I received from my nurse or what’s happening in politics.  Oops.  I guess I just did.  Friday can’t come soon enough.