Dropping the CF Bomb

I distinctly remember the moment A told me he had CF.  It was only a few weeks after we had started dating.  A showed me the large scar on his belly – the result of a surgery that was performed when he was just a tiny baby.  He told me that he had Cystic Fibrosis and gave me the impression that he really didn’t want to talk about it any further; he just wanted me to know.  I was stunned, but refrained from asking any further questions.  A seemed completely healthy to me.  He cleared his throat or coughed every now and then, but I never thought much of it.  I never even noticed the enzymes he took before a meal or snack.  After I left his house that night, I cried during my drive home.  The minimal knowledge I had of CF stemmed from a high school health class.  I only knew that the disease affected breathing and it wasn’t good.  I didn’t know the severity of A’s CF, but I couldn’t believe this new relationship was beginning with such a revelation.  That night as I drove home, I told myself it was fight or flight.  I was either in this relationship for the long run and was willing to deal with the challenges that CF would bring or I had to get out right now.  Complicating my decision was that fact that I had lost my dad unexpectedly just a year prior and I didn’t know if I was strong enough to handle A’s disease.  I might also add that Google is NOT your friend when you’re looking for positive stories regarding CF (Why does Google always seem to highlight the worst possible outcomes?!?!  Any time I Google some random symptom, I’m convinced I have rabies, Lyme Disease, or the bubonic plague.).

Obviously I decided to stick by A.  I figured there were no guarantees in life – we just have to make the most of the relationships we have and the situations we find ourselves in.  We’ve been together ever since and it remains one of the best decisions I ever made.

I’m also proud of A for taking great care of himself.  He’s awesome about his daily vest regimen, keeps up with all his medications/inhalers/nebulizers, and hardly ever misses a doctor’s appointment.  He’s awesome.